Tuesday, 21 August 2012


CORRECT USAGE OF A DRIVE-THROUGH ATM  (Note the car. That is crucial.)
 Apparently it is extremely bad form to walk through a drive-through ATM machine. If you attempt to do so, God will be alerted and your account will be shut down as well.

*Actual conversation overheard at drive-through TD bank machine in Brampton on Monday.

A man walks up to a TD bank machine in a drive-through lane and begins to do his banking. A car pulls up behind him. The driver opens the window and squawks, "Buddy, what do ya think yer doing?"

"Buddy" ignores the driver.

Driver honks.

Buddy appears unperturbed. Continues to do his banking. 
(I begin to admire his focus.)

Driver honks again. Toot! Toot! Adds, "What the fuck?" for good measure.

Buddy pulls the visor of his ballcap down and presses a few more ATM buttons. 
(I begin to wonder if perhaps Buddy is deaf.)

Driver leans out of the open window and yells, "HEY!"

Buddy gives him the merest flicker of a glance, but there is clearly a warning in it. 
(I begin to think it is FANTASTIC that I happen to be parked in a spot where I can spy on this live entertainment without being observed.)

Driver gives it one last shot, being very, very specific this time: "HEY ASSHOLE! THIS IS A DRIVE-THROUGH! You can't stand there and do your banking! You gotta DRIVE through!"

Buddy seems to have finished his banking now. He turns to walk away and the driver steps on the gas, gunning into the barely vacated spot.

Buddy continues walking, unperturbed. Then just before he rounds the corner to head out of sight, he glances over his shoulder at the driver, who is now punching frustratedly at the bank machine. "By the way, " Buddy says, "it's out of order."

And to think I was going to go to a movie theatre for entertainment tonight...