"Dratted TMZ. I hope I don't get sent to Afghanistan over this."
Emboldened by the maelstrom of publicity young Harry got when his privates went viral, Grandpa Philip, husband of the Queen of England, tried a little flesh flash of his own this weekend. So let me do a little scene-setting. Scotland. Highland Games. Prince Philip. 91 years of age. Kilt. Legs wide open. Spotted Dick. AAAAAAAAARRRGGGGGGGH!! MY EYES! (I repeat: 91 years of age.)
The event marked the first time the nonogenarian has been seen in public since being hospitalized for a bladder infection. And may I just say, "Wow, Prince P. Way to make a comeback."
EDITOR'S NOTE: Attempts to contact the Prince's representatives for comment didn't go well. "WHORRIFIED? What sort of bloody name is that? You're one of them birds what got our Harry into trouble, aren't you? BUGGER OFF before we beat you with one of Camilla's hoary hats!"
If you'd like to see a photo of a 91-year-old's privates . . . well first of all, what is WRONG with you? And second, it's on TMZ, although they gave it a rather tasteful "treatment." Click here (eek!) for the link.