Friday, 14 September 2012

MONICA LEWINSKY PAYS LIP SERVICE TO BOOK DEAL

featureflash/shutterstock

MY LIPS ARE SEALED!
"But they can be UNsealed ... for a price! 
Make me an offer. Any offer. 
I'll sing like a canary!" 





Ever wonder whatever happened to Monica Lewinsky? Personally I'd forgotten all about her, but the little scamp has  reared her president-servicing head once again. Yes, the woman whose lips led to the impeachment of President Bill Clinton in 1995 is reportedly shopping a "top secret" tell-all book. And "top secret" is a bit of a misnomer, as its existence is being crowed about by just about every gossip website you can think of. (Including mine. One does like to be on trend.) 

Apparently Lewinsky has been making the rounds with major publishers, all of whom were asked to sign nondisclosure agreements. And I may be missing something here, but the question that comes sharply to mind is, "Why now?" After all, we're talking about a blowout that occurred some 17 years ago. About an incident that has been thoroughly chronicled in dozens of books published back when it actually happened. 

So what can Lewi bring to the table that hasn't already been brought?
First-hand knowledge, I suppose. "Direct-from-the-whorse's-mouth" storytelling, I guess. "Let me tell you about Slick Willy's willy before Mitt defeats Barack and the Clintons suddenly become about as relevant as Rosalynn Carter" raconteuring, perhaps. I do not know and cannot pretend to imagine what this poor daft cow is thinking, but my catty best guess would be that she is out of money and about to turn 40, two things that can make even the most upstanding of women a bit desperate. 
So if you're starting to make your Christmas list and are looking for a juicy book to put on it, good old Spewie Lewi might just be able to oblige. 
I'm sure a book deal will be nailed down soon, at almost any price. ("You don't want to pay me $1M in advance royalties? How 'bout you drop your trousers, sir, and we'll discuss this again in about 5 minutes?")