Wednesday, 31 October 2012


By God, I wish they wouldn't make me
 sit beside this waif on our driveabouts. 
Makes me look like a right dirigible.

Just bloody marvelous. If Katie Couric sees me 
beside Old Bloaty, she'll start carrying on
 about my weight again, I just know it.
So it's official. Katie Couric gets my vote as Most Annoying Woman in America. And that is really saying something in a nation in which Snooki, Sarah Palin and Honey Boo Boo's mother are all in the running.
But Katie has made some recent remarks which, coupled with the fact that her voice is like a badger attack and she is paid millions to say age-inappropriate things like "What up with that?", gave her the clear edge she needed to clinch top spot.

In an interview with, Couric was asked who her "dream guest" would be for her new talk show, Katie. (Warning: Airs Mondays. Plan to be busy.)
Katie's response? 
"I think it would be really interesting to interview Kate Middleton because I think she has comported herself so well since she has been thrust in the limelight." 
Then her inner Couric perked up and made her add, "Although I think she needs to eat more because she's so thin."
Yes, well, that started out as a good answer, Katie. Shame about the tasteless non-sequitur. I think you can go ahead and pencil that "dream guest" of yours in for the 12th of Neverember. 

Editor's note: I'd enjoy watching the out-takes of that interview. I'm told she also said "I'd hold her down and make her eat crumpets and clotted cream, whatever that is. Cream on crumpets! What up with that?" and "Maybe even I would be too thin if I had to eat foods called Spotted Dick and Bangers and Mash. Or Toad in the Hole! What up with that?"