Wednesday, 31 October 2012


I thought a Goldendoodle was like 
some kindaTwinkie cake or somethin'!
 Oh well, at least it was only $12 Gs...  


Apparently Tameka Foster's divorce lawyers aren't doing their job properly. Because despite the protracted custody battle they're waging with her ex, Usher still has wads of cash to throw around on frivolous things like pets. Exhibit A: He just dropped $12,000 (yes, I have my zeroes right) on a friggin' Goldendoodle. And the only reason this doesn't make me apoplectic with disgust is that it was for charity. 

Usher outbid oodles of bidders at a Pencils for Promise fundraiser, with proceeds helping to build schools in impoverished nations. (Where I would hope that one of the first things they teach is that twelve thousand dollars is A LOT OF MONEY!)

In the euphoric moments after his winning bid, Usher did what every other celebrity does these days the instant a thought crosses their minds: he posted the news on Twitter: "All in the name of feline fun! It took me 2 years but I outbid everyone this year to bring Poppy home."

Let's, for a moment, ignore the fact that Usher doesn't know that "feline" means "cat" and concentrate on the fact that we need to start flooding his Twitter account with better names for his little Ush puppy. Cuz I reached my retching threshhold at "Goldendoodle." Asking me to stomach "Poppy" as well is just a little too much.

Editor's note: News flash for one Usher Raymond: That $12,000 puppy is going to pee all over your carpets just as thoroughly as a $50 mutt from the Humane Society would.