SINGER GOES FROM PINK TO SIZZLING RED-HOT

You could airbrush my entire body for two whole days
  and I still would not look like this. Way to go, Pink.

OK, ready? Who wants to feel like crap about their body and berate themselves about what they ate today? Whoooo, look at all those chubby little hands! Yes, thanks to the sick bastards at Shape magazine, we have this hot November cover shot of scantily clad Pink, looking like she's about to enter American Gladiators. Behold the chiseled abs, the taut belly, the toned thighs. 

Do you hate yourself enough yet? No? Well how 'bout this: she's also a new mom who "ate a lot of cheesecake during those nine months." She subsequently dropped 55 pounds by working out twice a day with two personal trainers and probably not eating any cheesecake at all. 

And if she can do it, this girl who used to sing about breakups and bar fights and getting really, really drunk, then the rest of us have no excuse. Girlfriend not only turned into a supermodel, but she took away our excuses!  Tsk. Pink, what have you DONE!?!

Editor's note: So would this be a bad time to say I think she's cute?
My note: Yes.