Demi's had a rough year, what with the humiliation of Ashton Kutcher's infidelity, the break-up and her subsequent nose-dive into a can of Reddi Whip. Then she got hit with a case of viral anorexia and even whipped cream was off her "permissible foods" list.
The good news is that she has been receiving rejuvenating treatments at the photoshop, and they're really paying off. Yes, this may be what Demi actually looks like these days, but guess what? The world doesn't have to know about that. Because she can simply have any and every photo of herself tweaked to look like this. And I have to be honest, I don't think I'd recognize either of those Demis if I tripped over them in the nitrous oxide aisle.
Well this has all kind of slipped away on me here, but I think what I'm trying to say is, er, happy 50th, Demi!
Editor's note: This may be the clumsiest birthday greeting I have ever heard. You might as well have told her to bend over and prepare to receive the birthday fist.
My note: Well that would just be mean.