WHO DARES DISTURB MY SLUMBER? OFF WITH HER HEAD!

DO I LOOK LIKE A DIVA TO YOU? HUH? DO I?
  Photo/CreStock

Jennifer Lopez would like the great unwashed to know that the persistent rumours about her being a diva are hurtful and untrue. You may have heard about that maid who was fired from her job at the German hotel J Lo was staying at simply because she had the dirty nerve to asked for J Lo's autograph? That is pure, unfortunate coincidence.

True, the maitre d'hotel did receive a complaint that J Lo was "disturbed" whilst being fabulous in her gazillion-dollar room. 
True, the maid was summarily sacked for said disturbance. 
True, the maid was also summarily crestfallen and inconsolable, explaining to German newspaper Bild: "I cleaned on her floor. And I am an incredibly big fan so I took all my courage and rang the bell to get an autograph." (Well that'll teach you, hey, domestic peasant? You think life is a Maid in Manhattan movie? Ptooey!)

However, you have to remember: J Lo is a goddess. Not a diva, mind you; that is something sort of  not really entirely different. So how can we expect her to understand that it took every ounce of nerve that maid had to knock on the door, knowing that her shimmering, bronze-flecked idol lurked within? That perhaps she might not only get an autograph but also . . . oh, dare to dream! . . . the chance to personally scrub her toilet? Instead, she was met with two goons in J Lo's employ, who gave her the bum's rush.  

In J Lo's defence, when the news broke yesterday that she had complained about the maid and got her fired, she took to Twitter to insist she had nothing to do with it, then signed off with the hashtag #hurtful. And if she thinks THAT'S hurtful, imagine how the unemployed maid feels.

Oh well, there's nothing J Lo can do about it now. It's not as if she could pick up the phone and with one simple request have the poor chit pardoned and reinstated.
Because to do that, she would have to be a diva or something. Which she is not. Obviously.