Saturday, 22 December 2012

WHEREBY I RECOVER FROM LAST NIGHT'S 'RESEARCH'

You may remember last night when I sent out a community alert that I would be going to a party. Which in hindsight was almost quaint in its naivete, because it turned out to be more of a Code Orange, citywide-siren situation.
So it started out as a lovely gathering of attractive and intelligent co-workers celebrating the festive season at a downtown bar. (A few unattractive and stupid interlopers tried to sneak in but were quickly seized and neutered by security. One must protect future generations from bad breeders.) The food and the liquor were plentiful and refreshing, but as the night wore on, everyone seemed to forget there was food there at all. At the end of the night, we all kind of wandered over to the groaning buffet table and were like, "The hell? Look at all this food! That was there the whole time? I think I'll have another beer!"

Anyway, I think everyone got home safely since I haven't heard otherwise on the national news, so I'm going to resume soaking my whole head in a bowl of liquid Advil and let photos tell the rest of the story. Note to photos: Pls tell quietly. Head feeling a bit throbby...

THERE WERE BEAUTIFUL WOMEN . . .
THERE WERE CRAZY WOMEN (that's my identical twin sister, Shmarie...)

THERE WERE SHARP DRESSERS (If I told you what that bow tie was made of, 
you might call Peta. Or you might want one. Or both.)


THERE WERE PEOPLE WHO SPOKE SIGN LANGUAGE
(These two are saying "We've had a few. . .")

THIS ONE IS SAYING "YOU GOTTA BRUSH...THAT...DIRT OFF YOUR SHOULDERS!"

And after that, the music got louder and the drinks got drinkier and everything seemed HILARIOUS and everybody's face looked like this:

So, yeah. Pretty much best party ever.
MERRY CHRISTMAS ONE AND ALL!
Note to photos: GODDAMIT! Did I not just ask you to talk softly????