Tuesday, 15 December 2015

YOU'D BETTER WATCH OUT, YOU'D BETTER NOT CRY

Where is this, you ask? Sorry, can't tell you. Top secret. (Brampton, Ontario)

Moving on to yet another Brampton street for our festive Neighbourhood Shaming series, we have this knockout effort that really puts the rest of the homes on its street to shame. Notice how the entire perimeter of the garage door has been lovingly festooned with jolly washed-out lights that just scream "Christmas."

Little Johnny: Dad, are those our Christmas lights?
Dad: Of course they're our Christmas lights.

Little Johnny: Oh.They don't look like Christmas lights.
Dad: *getting testy* Whaddaya mean? 

Little Johnny: Well they're not coloured.
Dad: So what? They're lights.


Little Johnny: But they're not fancy.
Dad: THEY'RE LIGHTS! *cups hands around mouth, bellows for wife* Junie! Come get your kid!


Little Johnny: *lowering brows mulishly* Those are the same lights you put up for the barbecue last summer and never took down. Santa isn't going to like that!
Dad: Yeah, well you know what else Santa don't like? Santa don't like wisenheimers! Now beat it before I tell him what a little shit you've been all year!


Little Johnny: *running away* Mo-o-om! Daddy called me a little shit!