HUSH, MY PETS, FOR TODAY WE MUST BE SERIOUS

Click: RED LIKE PENNIES

Click: DARK LIKE DESIRE

Click: BLONDE LIKE BARBIE 

I know Whorrified is usually a sweet, sugary mountain of fluff drizzled with delicious, decadent snarkasm. But there have been some sombre developments in my personal life and so for today, I have some serious matters to discuss. 
I need to talk to you about ... my hair. 
The gray other colour is just growing in too fast, so I think maybe it's time to switch shades. I'm getting sick of the constant maintenance of being blonde ... what, you thought I was a natural blonde?  That's priceless. Although I do look spectacular, I must say.

Anyway, what I'm looking for here is a little input. Click on the captions, above, to see the unretouched versions of what I look like with red, blonde and my natural dark hair, and feel free to weigh in. Please, no "I'll shave you bald again if you like" suggestions. Dildo correspondent, I am lookin' at YOU.

Editor's note: What IS it with you and Carrot Top?
My note: Just this: he scares me shitless. You know those nightmares you have as a kid when a demon clown is chasing you through the streets trying to catch you and kill you? That friggin clown looked EXACTLY like Carrot Top!
Editor's note: So red's out, then.