SOFIA VERGARA MAKES GRAB FOR RIHANNA'S CROWN

MY BOYFRIEND, HE SO CRRRAZEE!
Nicki ripped my dress in a club because 
he no like other mens to look at me! So 
the next day I punish him ... by wearing 
my bunga-bunga bathing suit and 
crawling all over him! Smart, no?
Photo/CreStock

Those of you who think I'm picking on Rihanna are going to be really happy to hear that there's a new enabler in town: Sofia Vergara. 
I know. I didn't see that one coming either.

Sofia's fiance, Nick Loeb,  pulled a Chris Brown on her in a Miami nightclub on New Year's Eve by going ballistic when she posed for a photo with a fan. Her sexy pose so enraged him he put the smackdown on both the fan AND his beloved, ripping her strapless dress and exposing her fabled breasts. (You can imagine how aggrieved the nightclub patrons were to get this free peep show. Terrible, terrible New Year's Eve buzz killer.)

Well we all know how much Sofia hates exposing her boobs. Yet the very next day, she and the future Mr. Vergara were canoodling on the beach, grinning like hyenas and acting as if their domestic violence episode was just a page from their Fifty Shades of Newlyweds exercise book. Click here on the link to their day-after beach romp, in which Sofia exhibits exactly ZERO signs of trauma and in fact appears to be going for round two with that way-too-sexy-for-a-jealous-boyfriend bathing suit. Ay carumba!

Depending on how healthy your psyche is, you will either be deeply relieved to learn that having amazing breasts and money and a hot boyfriend is absolutely no guarantee of happiness, or you will be sad that sweet, likable Sofia is putting up with Nick Loeb's shitty behaviour.
Yeah, me too. I'm totally going with DEEPLY RELIEVED.