Wednesday, 27 March 2013


Looks like my sensitivity filter needs replacing. Again. Man, I go through those things like water. *taps head, waits expectantly* Oh! I'm not wearing one! That explains a lot. Anyway, I appear to be the only one who finds the draft version of a Ford ad that got its creators fired hilarious. You've heard about the ad? No? Well that's it up there. 

In it, the artists basically follow my psychic instructions to the letter, depicting the insufferable Kardashian sisters bound and gagged in the hatchback of a Ford Figo while former Kardashian bestie-turned-mortal enemy Paris Hilton winks in the front seat. The caption: Leave your worries behind with Ford's extra-large boot.

The Kardashians immediately saw dollar signs red. Kris reportedly shrieked, "NOBODY EXPLOITS MY CHILDREN BUT ME!" while Kim whimpered "They didn't make my boobs big enough!" and Khloe sighed: "As usual, I'm the homely one." 
They immediately summoned their lawyers ... who were sitting right there in the driveway anyway because, hello, you work for the Litigians, there is no downtime ... who printed up Lawsuit Threat No. 317: Insulting Adverts and released a statement noting the Litigians intended to sue because they found the ad "offensive and tasteless." And if anyone knows "offensive and tasteless," it's this brood.

The ad agency immediately tucked tail, pulled the ad off the drawing board, blamed their Indian employees and ordered the lot of them beheaded.
"Sorry about this, lads, we feel dirty for having to endure all this free publicity but that's the way it goes. Now close your eyes ...." THWACK!

Paris Hilton's note: Like, ooomigod! I was finally going to be famous again. Those stupid Kardashians ruin everything!