Friday, 8 March 2013


Kelly Osbourne/CreStock
Kelly Osbourne was rushed to the hospital yesterday after she collapsed during a taping of Fashion Police. She reportedly felt faint, turned to cohost Melissa Rivers and said, "JESUS CHRIST, I'M STARVING! Give me half a low-fat wheat thin, will ya!?" before sagging to the floor in a heap. 

Okay, she didn't say that, and yes, I am a bad person who is going to hell, but I'll worry about that when I get there. And so will they. 

What she actually said was "I don't feel good." But any idiot can see that, even though the official word is that Kelly is "exhausted," she is in fact starving. And very likely on weight-loss pills, some of which I consider to be only slightly less dangerous than crack cocaine. 

So let's please stop saying drastic weight loss is marvelous and that every woman is meant to look like Victoria Beckham, because it is not healthy and it is not true. Ladies, give yourselves a break today and have that piece of red velvet cake. Because if Kelly Osbourne had done that, she might be sleeping peacefully at home in her OWN bed tonight.

Editor's note: Well this isn't what I had in mind when I suggested an International Women's Day message, but it'll do.