Wednesday, 17 April 2013

J HUD LOOKS GREAT FOR A STARVING PERSON

WEIGHT WATCHERS SPOKESPERSON 
JENNIFER HUDSON 
And I must say, that outfit really  
shows off her lovely collarbones. 
 
Is it just me? Does nobody else look at Jennifer Hudson and think: "Holy fuck, that girl needs to eat something! Like RIGHT NOW!" 

For years now, J Hud has been on a diet. Which was fine at first, because she was heavy. And after awhile she was curvy. And then she was thin. And then she was thinner. And then she just kept going, so that now her skin hangs off her bones and there are deep folds in her face where her cheeks used to be and she looks like she would love to eat that thing in your hand, what is that thing, that ... "What? It's a tensor bandage wrapped around your broken wrist? WELL BY GOD IT LOOKS DEELICIOUS! GRRRRAAAAAAAWWL!!!"
(*Ack! My God! Her jaws! Why are they so strong?*)

But nobody else seems to be seeing this. 
The skinnier she gets, the louder the headlines scream their approval. Current shameful winner: The Huffington Post, which ran this big fat lie beside a photo of Jennifer's emaci-face: "Lookin' good, J Hud! Star lets her bra pop out, shows off incredible figure at movie premiere!"
When in fact it should have said this: "Jennifer Hudson has lost 80 pounds, which is practically a whole person. So maybe she didn't 'let' her bra pop out, maybe it fell out because there's no flesh left for it to cling onto."

EDITOR'S NOTE: Nobody is ever going to print that headline.
MY NOTE: I know, but it felt good saying it.