Tuesday, 18 June 2013

PRANCERCISE VIXEN MATES WITH JOHN FRIGGIN MAYER

PRANCERCISE STUNNER JOANNA ROHRBACK, LEFT, studies the moves of a seasoned stallion and, marvelous, I've just realized John Mayer is going to think that's a metaphor.

A couple of weeks ago, a video from the '80s resurfaced and made a huge splash. And then everybody forgot about it. And now it's about to make another huge splash because apparently this madwoman is not only still alive but also still prancing ... and still wearing her goddamn jewels and what looks like a wig and a set of fake horse teeth. I swear her head looks like something straight out of a Will Ferrell skit. 

Anyway, Joanna Rohrback, founder of Prancercise, has teamed up with John Manwhore (although he pronounces it "Mayer," much as I pronounce "menopause" as "Seriously, I'm 29") because his career needed a goose plus this dude will sleep with anything if it stops prancing long enough. 
So please enjoy this woman plying her moves in the streets of whateverville to the dulcet tones of Manwhore's "Paper Doll," offering you full camel toe as well as nightmarish visions of what her skin must look like under that getup. She's 87 if she's a day.

EDITOR'S NOTE: I took the liberty of editing out the part where a white truck pulls up behind her and three men drag her away in a big net.
MY NOTE: Excellent. Compassion: that's what we're all about here on Whorrified.