Wednesday, 11 September 2013



It's tough to find your niche in a big family. Take the Kardashians: Kim is the sex kitten with an ass the size of Rhode Island, Khloe is the illegitimate Yeti, Bruce is the beard, Rob is the token male. But young Kendall Jenner is rapidly establishing herself as "the stupid one." Check out this video she posted of herself driving while famewhoring, which is not only repugnant in a "Why the fuck are these people allowed to be rich?" kind of way, but also in a "Sweet mother of vehicular manslaughter, between her and Bieber they'll kill us all" kind of way.
About the only thing that keeps me from picking up the phone myself and calling the LAPD is the fact that I'm sure her super-strict parents will handle this appropriately. 

Kris: "I saw that video you posted on Instagram, young lady, and you are in big, BIG trouble! Driving while singing and pouting fully clothed? How many times have we been over this? How do you ever expect to get famous that way? Have you learned nothing from your boring sister Kourtney? No nudity, no sex tape: Boom! Nobody cares about Kourtney!"
Kendall: "I’m sorry Mommy. I was looking for Uncle Lamar."
Kris: "You were? Omigosh! My little bunny! That's so sweet." *flicks Bruce Jenner's hand off her shoulder* C'mere and give yer mommy a kiss. And a martini."