Thursday, 5 September 2013


Jennifer Richardson, Lamar Odom,
If you turn to page 3 of any issue of Crack Whore Magazine
you'll find a photo of a woman who looks 
pretty much exactly like this, right down to the 
stencilled eyebrows and the shoulder tattoo.  

Hilariously, the woman who allowed Lamar Odom to use her like a Vaseline-smeared Kleenex for years is now trying to pass herself off as a nice lady instead of the slut we all know her to be. Because apparently, she fretted over his well-being. He seemed "so troubled," Jennifer Richardson tells anyone who will pay listen. "So distant So lost." So ... rich and blackmailable. *pauses to reapply blush with industrial-strength trowel*  

So naturally, she figured the best thing to do would be to offer him therapeutic vagina on demand and listen to his rambling, drug-addled bullshit and basically just enable him to continue to believe he didn't need no stinkin' rehab until the whole thing blew up in his married face and made her famous. (Hey, it worked for Monica Lewinsky.)

I'm sure you all feel like shit now for thinking it was just a cheap affair, when obviously it was a humanitarian gesture on Richardson's part. This is what separates the saints from us ordinary mortals, people. Selfless devotion to the afflicted, and therefore, our Lord.