Sunday, 8 September 2013


For awhile there, I was worried about Rihanna. Because once all the breakup histrionics ended, both she and Chris Brown became capital-B boring. 

But lately she's hit her scandal stride again because although the butt tweets have stopped, the chest shots and weave mutilations have begun. Get a load of this pic of Rihanna's tatted boobs en route to an after-party during New York Fashion Week, in which the only thing that can take your eyes off her chest is the greased skunk pelt on her head. 

Oy, Rihanna. I know "Missing a worthless shithead so much I can't even match my dress to my shoes anymore" when I see it. Fortunately for you, I'm still very much in touch with my Brazilian voodoo roots (I was only in it for the sacrifices) and I can break this evil spell for you. Just stand still for a moment, please, while I chant: "I break with thee, I break with thee, I break with thee" and then throw dog poop on your mullet. 

EDITOR'S NOTE: You're being awfully hard on the girl. I mean it wasn't that long ago she used to cope  by doing this.

AT LEFT: Rihanna at New York Fashion Week
(And I don't know about you, but if I were going to a fashion show, those would not  be the shoes I would choose.)