|IN A DESPERATE BID TO KEEP HER CAREER |
from being twerked off the edge of a cliff
by Miley Cyrus's bony goat arse, Lady Gaga
is planning to perform in outer space.
While totally naked, I'm sure.
Unfortunately, it's not drastic enough for my liking (unless she plans to stay there), but nevertheless, come the year 2015, the pop star will be catapulted into the ether on a Virgin Galactic spaceship, where she will belt out one song while orbiting the Earth.
Yawn. How derivative. Chris Hadfield's already been there and done that, plus, hello, don't you get it? Twerking, Gaga! That's what the people want.
Oh well, maybe she'll get lucky and find a new audience. I'm sure aliens are much more easily impressed by human nudity than we are. "Mmm. Hermat genitalia and strange strange music. What is this sensation in my ear loins? I cannot quantify it."