Thursday, 7 November 2013

JUSTIN BIEBER DIDN'T REALIZE WHORES ARE SNEAKY

Justin Bieber, Tatiana Neves Barbosa, Brazil,
THIS GRAINY VIDEO GRAB SHOWS
the Biebs sleeping in a surprisingly 
shitty-looking hotel room while 
a tramp begins the process of 
attaching herself to his wallet for life.





Today in other Canadian disasters being outed on video news, we have Justin Bieber forgetting rule No. 1 of celebrity sleazing: Never nap when there's a whore in the room.

Because here he is being caught with his pants down and his mouth open by some tramp he probably had sex with. The young hooker lady filmed this video showing the Biebs sleeping while she looks on, smiling and blowing him kisses at his bedside, and then posted it to YouTube, where it will serve as damning evidence for the paternity suit she no doubt plans to slap him with exactly nine months from now. 

How she managed to smuggle her iPhone into the room is one of the great mysteries of our time, not unlike the mystery of how a kid who doesn’t even have pubes yet can be having all this wild sex with Brazilian women. Then again, maybe it’s not such a mystery. Maybe it’s pretty obvious: The Biebs’ minders either went to The Prince Harry Bodyguards Academy of Prince-Minding or they're actually trying to get fired before their shoulders give out. Get a load of the video here, below. Warning: Pubes. BaHAHAHHA! As if!

EDITOR'S NOTE: So we're not toning it down anymore, then?