Saturday, 28 December 2013

BRITNEY'S VEGAS SHOW GOES OFF WITHOUT A HITCH :-(

DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME 
Unless 'home' is my house, in which case you 
can't help yourself. It just happens spontaneously.


Britney Spears kicked off her two-year Vegas residency Friday night and if anyone was expecting embarrassment and disaster, they were bitterly disappointed. 

The audience of 4,500 people (oh wait, one of those was Miley Cyrus, so 4,499 people and one hillbilly) screamed their nonstop approval throughout the 90-minute show, which included acrobatics, confetti, frantic costume changes and a frequently airborne Spears. 

Here, wearing what appears to be the same nude bodysuit JLo wears at every friggin concert, is Britneybitch luring the pent-up sexual energy of the entire planet directly to her firecrotch. It's an amazing trick and not as easy as it looks. It took me years to master it.

THE ADVENTURES OF JLo's BODYSUIT: Because you haven't seen enough skin today, I'm sure of it, here is a gallery of the many many MANY times JLo has worn that damn nude bodysuit, which should serve as a warning to Britney to retire hers.
JLo's bodysuit visits Panama
JLo's bodysuit moves on to Madrid
JLo's bodysuit getting tired, but makes it to Portugal 
JLo's bodysuit begs for a cleaning, gets flown to Rio instead
JLo's bodysuit makes a break for it, only gets to London 
JLo's bodysuit ... well you get the point. Enough already.