|'BE CAREFUL, GRANDMA! YOU'RE |
SUPPOSED TO BABYSIT US TOMORROW!'
Kris Jenner will be 60 in less than two years,
unless she kills herself by falling off
a stripper pole headfirst before then.
"But why?" you ask, as if there has to be a reason for Kris Jenner to do age-inappropriate, batshit crazy things. Kris and her daughter, Kim, are taking pole-dancing lessons together because apparently that's how the Kardashians get their figure back after shatting out a baby, plus when your best friend (this week, anyway) is a stripper you tend to find this sort of thing more germane than aqua-fit classes.
Listen, Kris, I get that you're ecstatic your vagina doesn't have to share a bed with Bruce Jenner's vagina anymore, but good goddam lord, woman! You're a 58-year-old grandmother! Some things just aren't meant to happen and this horrifying image meeting up with my retinas is one of them. Although I suppose I should just be grateful this wasn't a video.