Monday, 27 July 2015

CARA DELEVINGNE IS DABBLING IN OLD LESBIANS NOW

Cara Delevingne, knicks game, michelle rodriguez, victoria's secret supermodels, whorrified,
MICHELLE RODRIGUEZ AND CARA DELEVINGNE CANOODLING DRUNKENLY at a Knicks game. (I've spared you the pictures of them kissing and getting so wasted they practically soil themselves because it's an insult to respectable drunks everywhere.)

Fast and Furious star Michelle Rodriguez is making an honest lesbian of Victoria's Secret supermodel and wild child Cara Delevingne (*runs Spellcheck, frowns* "Is it just me or are there too many 'N's in that kid's name?") by finally forcing her to admit that they're dating. Because apparently this picture alone wasn't doing the job. And since that fantastically progressive piece I wrote on Ellen Page's amazeballs coming-out extravaganza, I'm able to greet this news with the enthusiasm it deserves. Meaning that I am man enough to admit that, aside from the fact that Michelle is a gender-confused much older woman with a pernicious substance abuse problem, they're perfect for each other. What could possibly go wrong here?

EDITOR'S NOTE: I had no idea Cara was gay but I suppose when one spends one's days looking at this sort of thing, it was inevitable.