Sunday, 16 February 2014

JESSICA SIMPSON WILL MAKE YOU PERVS RESPECT HER

jessica simpson, celebrities nude scenes, martin scorsese, whorrified,
AND HERE IS JESSICA SIMPSON, METHOD ACTOR, digging deep into her fully dressed psyche for her role in Blonde Ambition. One can only imagine the career heights she'd have soared to if it hadn't been for her pride and that stupid T-shirt.

This could just be the second bottle of wine talking but I stumbled across a HuffPo story called Celebrities Who Won't Do Nude Scenes and threw an unbecoming laughing fit when I saw who was No 1: Jessica "Lifejackets" Simpson. (And yes, I am referring to the same Jessica Simpson who allows her newborn daughter to be ogled in a string bikini.)  

Jessica, who clearly doesn't realize the only two reasons she is famous, piously intones: "I don't care how dark and intellectual the role could be; I don’t care if I frickin' could get an Oscar for it, I will never do nudity." I have no way of knowing how Martin Scorsese reacted to this catastrophic news but I'm thinking it was probably something like this: "BAHAHAHAAAA!"
Click here to see the full list of celebrities who think their tits are too precious to ever be seen by us plebes.

EDITOR'S NOTE: Well I guess she's forgotten about this photo shoot then.
JESSICA'S NOTE: It doesn't count if you're pregganint, dopey!