Saturday, 19 April 2014

HEIDI KLUM'S HOOTERS ARE ENJOYING THEIR VACATION

heidi klum, vito schnabel, tulum photos, whorrified, editorspick,
HERE'S HEIDI KLUM TAKING SOME TEENAGER FOR A WALK 
while wearing almost nothing but a ballcap and a smile.
Spletnik/Twitter

Heidi Klum is on vacation in Tulum, Mexico. Her bikini top, meanwhile, is apparently on vacation somewhere else, because it hasn't once made an appearance the entire time she's been there. The 40-year-old runway goddess has been incessantly tweeting naked-knocker pics while in Tulum, as is her vacation wont. You do remember her topless-in-Tahiti junket, don't you? You don't? Well click here and see if this jogs your memory glands.

You've gotta feel sorry for her much-younger new boyfriend, 27-year-old art dealer Vito Schnabel, above. I'm told guys hate it when cougars bounce around topless in front of them. Although I must say that, considering I am looking at photos of an almost nude supermodel, I am feeling absolutely zero sexual heat while simultaneously experiencing a strange craving for pancakes with a side of stewing hen. 
(If you thought I was going to let this one go by without indulging my trademark body-shaming urges you do NOT know me. Which is wise of you.)