Sunday, 13 April 2014

KATE UPTON CLEARLY DOESN'T KNOW WHY SHE'S FAMOUS

editorspick, kate upton, the other woman, sports illustrated, katy perry, whorrified,
KATE UPTON'S GROSS BIG JUGS, 
  ruining what would otherwise have been an Oscar-worthy scene from The Other Woman.

Those of you who thought Kate Upton was just some giant-breasted bimbo who pimps out her hooters in exchange for fame are so, so wrong. You couldn't be more wrong if you tried because you know what? Cheese! And also penguins.

Pardon me? That makes no sense, you say? Well Thatmakesnosense is Kate Upton's mother tongue, so the least you could do is make an effort to understand her when she brays that she hates her uber-hooters.
The legally retarded Upton, who is just one brain cell away from being a Guernsey, tells Britain's The Sun on Sunday that not a day goes by that she doesn't wish she had smaller boobs, "as I love to wear spaghetti tops braless.”  
“Every single day, I’m like, ‘Oh, man, it would be so much easier,’ especially if people didn’t constantly bring them up." 

Excuse me? IF PEOPLE DIDN'T CONSTANTLY BRING THEM UP? Perhaps we'd be less inclined to "bring them up" if you didn't constantly fling them in our faces and bounce them around like zero-gravity doughballs and use them as a constant distraction from the fact that, intellectually speaking, you're pretty much on par with a giant-breasted pea-hen.

Please click here and here and most of all right friggin here to see why Kate Upton is hands- and boobs-down the most disingenuous dumb bunny ever to infiltrate Hollywood. 

EDITOR'S NOTE: Upton? I thought her last name was Perry.
MY NOTE: No, you're thinking of that other giant-breasted Kate, who at least is just smart enough to know which side her bread is buttered on. And it's the "boobs" side.