|NICK LOEB BROKE UP WITH HIS FIANCEE, |
Modern Bosoms actress Sofia Vergara,
because he's insane.
Take Loeb's behaviour fresh off his emancipation: he spent a low-key weekend at a party in the Hamptons with a male friend, where he brushed off several female hopefuls with the words: “I don’t need to see hot girls, I’ve got my friend here.” Page Six also notes "the 38-year-old was seen chatting with attractive women, including Rachel Heller . . . and gave one girl his jacket since it was chilly, but him and his friend left alone.”
Uh-huh. The man breaks up with this, spurns the chance to immediately merge with the next available vagina, spends the weekend with his "friend" — the only thing that would make this more obvious would be if the evening ended with Zac Efron riding in on a dildo while the theme song from The Crying Game played in the background. Which a source tells me actually did happen, and I quote:
"What the ... ZAC! Am I dreaming right now?"
"No, Nick, it's all real. Hop on!"
"Oh thank God." *straddles dildo* "Get me out of here, there are too many bosoms here."
"Flashbacks? You poor dear ..."
*Sobs* "I know. It was horrible. Horrible!"