Sunday, 25 May 2014

KIM AND KANYE GOT MARRIED; WE'RE CALLING THIS NEWS

Kim Kardashian, Kanye West, North West, Vogue, Anna Wintour, Whorrified,
KIM AND KANYE, SEEN HERE WITH BABY NORTH WEST IN A VOGUE PHOTO SHOOT, are now legally married. I think we're all supposed to give a shit?
Vogue/April 2014

It's a gorgeous spring day (finally) in Toronto and there is absolutely no celebrity news to report whatsoever because I'm busy drinking. Unless of course you count the fact that Kim Kardashian and Kanye got married in some rennaissance fort in Florence, which I don't because unlike Anna Wintour I do not recognize Kim Kardashian as anything other than the massive butt of jokes. (And also the anti-christ. She's the anti-christ for sure.) Anyway, I suppose as a gossip blogger I must at least acknowledge the whorror that is Kimye making it "official," despite the fact that the bride and groom both revealed ample decolletage and that Kim wore what appears to be a sheet duct-taped to her udders. Yup, you totally made the right call putting that on your cover, Anna. Sweet mother of famewhores, won't someone please make these two go away?

EDITOR'S NOTE: And if this wasn't the first song at their wedding, there is no God.