Tuesday, 8 July 2014

BOBBY BROWN IS AGING EXACTLY AS YOU WOULD EXPECT

Bobby Brown, Rob Ford, New Edition, TMZ,
BOBBY BROWN ON STAGE (BRIEFLY) IN MISSISSIPPI,
 in what turned out to be more of a public service announcement than a performance.
TMZ VIDEO

Because I am a bad person, perhaps even a bitch (Editor's note: "Perhaps"???), I can't stop watching this TMZ video of Bobby Brown making a triumphant return as a performer. Except not the sort of performer you might think. Because someone unwisely decided to give the woman-beating, crack-smoking, randomly breeding, no-child-support-paying fool a paying gig, knowing full well that the money would be spent in the darkest corners of society, and look what became of it. Pure shadenfreude, wrapped in comedy, wrapped in a cautionary tale. Watch as Bobby (on your far left), age 45 going on 80, barely shuffles through the dance routine, bends over double gasping for air after singing a few bars, then completely bails when the crew starts to kick things up a notch. Don't do drugs, kids. I'm tellin' ya. *hits rewind* Ha! *hits rewind* I hope Rob Ford is watching this! *hits rewind* 

EDITOR'S NOTE: And she thinks she pays me too much. *adjusts sound-blocking headphones, turns volume up on Abba's Greatest Hits*