|JOAN RIVERS, PROBABLY DESCRIBING THE SIZE OF KIM KARDASHIAN'S ASS |
(Now who's gonna mock the everloving crap out of celebrity morons? Oh yeah: me!)
Legendary comedienne Joan Rivers has died, a week after her heart suddenly stopped beating during vocal cord surgery. She was 81. Joan's daughter, Melissa, took her off life support so she could pass comfortably in a private room.
Although you'd never know it from the way I carry on here on at Whorrified, I actually have the deepest respect for Joan Rivers and not just because I love a bitch who can talk smack. Rivers was a comedic genius and more importantly, she was a trailblazer. (Those of you who are too young to remember her as anything other than the overly "refreshed" host of Fashion Police don't know what you're missing, so I supplied some videos below.) She helped pave the way for many comediennes, and she never once backed down on her wickedly barbed humour. No one was off-limits, least of all herself. Years after her husband, Edgar Rosenberg, committed suicide in 1987, she famously said: "My husband killed himself. And it was my fault. We were making love and I took the bag off my head."
There were many pompous asses who took umbrage, who couldn't take a joke, and who demanded apologies. Joan told them all to go fuck themselves. Only much more bluntly. She stuck up for herself and she stuck to her guns because she would rather mock an idiotic ass than kiss it. There aren't enough women in Hollywood who are willing to do that, in my opinion. Rest in peace, Joan Rivers. God or whoever is in charge up there is in for some serious laughing fits. And probably some insults.