Monday, 19 October 2015

IGGY AZALEA LOOKS NOTHING LIKE THIS, I PROMISE YOU

IGGY AZALEA-ISH
WIKIPEDIA
Those of you who know me know I am a sweet woman who always sometimes never says mean things about anyone, let alone one of my own species, but today is a special day. A day on which I feel morally compelled to share a photo not out of malice but as a public service announcement to my fellow women. Because while rapper-slash-science project Iggy Azalea would like us all to believe that she looks like the photo shown here, the truth-seeking gurus at TMZ have revealed that in fact she looks like this photo here.

When I saw this makeup-free gotcha shot, my first thought was "Holy shit! Darryl Hannah's mom looks AMAZING!" Then I read the headline and my second thought was "Bahahahaaaa!" 

Yes folks, this is what Iggy Azalea really looks like when her weave is unspooled and the spackle has melted off on a trans-Atlantic red-eye. In other words, she looks like any of us would look after a trans-Atlantic red-eye. Or always. And lest some of you think I'm being mean, piss off. She's 25. NO MERCY!

EDITOR'S NOTE So we're in favour of makeup-free photos then? Good, because I have some lovely ones of you that I would love to post on the World Wide Web. 
MY NOTE Go right ahead! But first, please pass me the meat cleaver? No not that one, the ISIS-approved neck-sized one.