Tuesday, 6 October 2015


FRESHLY DIVORCED AVRIL LAVIGNE posted these mysterious images and captioned them: "Yeehaw! Writing with Chad today!" What does it mean? WHAT DOES IT MEAN??? 
If you, like nobody in their right mind, ever, has been pining for a Chavril reunion since they announced their divorce barely more than one goddam month ago, pine no more. In fact, why don't you just go ahead and set yourself on fire? It'd probably be less painful. Because Avril Lavigne, the cunning linguist minx, has gone and got us all fired up by posting this and other teasers to her Instagram account which I'm told ones and twos of you actually follow in what is either A) a clue that the most perfect mismatch in Canadian history is reuniting or B) a famewhoringly shameless bid for attention. I leave it to you to figure out which. (Hint: It's B.)  
Please enjoy these images of ineffable artsy fartsiness and see if you can figure out what it all means. Me, I'm going to put on a hairshirt and listen to Bud the Spud on endless repeat. Say what you will about Stompin' Tom, but at least he never toyed with us like these two do, eh?

EDITOR'S NOTE Obviously Avril Lavigne has never read your brilliant opus on the dangers of being friends with your ex.